Friday, July 12, 2019

Funnies

The Lawyer And The Angel

After dying suddenly at the age of 46, Jack the lawyer was greeted by an angel at the gates of Heaven.

“We’ve been waiting for you for a long time,” the angel said.

“What do you mean?” Jack replied. “I’m 46, right in the prime of my life, far too young to die.”

“You’re not 46, you’re 85,” said the angel.

“If you think I’m 85 then you definitely have the wrong guy. I can even show you my birth certificate,” Jack said.

The angel told Jack to wait while he went and checked some records. After a few minutes the angel returned and said, “By our records you are 85. I’ve checked all the hours you’ve billed your clients and you definitely have to be 85!”

*****

Ha!  Yep, those billable hours finally came back to bite him! 

Have a great weekend!

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Funnies

Sunday, July 7, 2019

Psalm 18:30

Psalm 18:30“As for God, his way is perfect: The LORD’s word is flawless; he shields all who take refuge in him.”

Brought to you by BibleGateway.com. Copyright (C) . All Rights Reserved.

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Bible, Faith, Verse

Saturday, July 6, 2019

What Color Red Are You?

You Are Apple Red

You’re never one to take life too seriously, and because of it, you’re a ton of fun.
And although you have a great sense of humor, you are never superficial.
Deep and caring, you do like to get to the core of people – to understand them well.
However, any probing you do is light hearted and fun, sometimes causing people to misjudge you.

 

This is one of the results from the quiz, What Color Red Are You?

 

*****

I do like to get to the core of people (apple, get it? lol) but I wouldn’t say that I never take life too seriously.  Sometimes, it is only serious.  Everything in it’s season. 

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Quiz

Friday, July 5, 2019

Funnies

Bureaucracy Fun

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert.

Congress said, “Someone may steal from it at night.”  So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job. 

Then Congress said, “How does the watchman do his job without instruction?”

So they created a planning department and hired two people, one person to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies. 

Then Congress said, “How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?” So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people, one to do the studies and one to write the reports. 

Then Congress said, “How are these people going to get paid?” So They created the following positions, a time keeper, and a payroll officer, then hired two people. 

Then Congress said, “Who will be accountable for all of these people?” So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal Secretary. 

Then Congress said, “We have had this command in operation for one Year and we are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost.”  So they laid off the night watchman.

*****

Sounds about right!  😉

Have a lovely weekend!

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Funnies

Thursday, July 4, 2019